We do not always know when our service is misused by another. There are times when we can judge by the results we see, as in Matthew 7:16, “You shall know them by their fruits,” but we cannot judge the heart. For example, Saul of Tarsus certainly misused the gift of the Law, but his encounter on the road to Damascus changed the direction of his life and he wholeheartedly devoted himself to Christ (Acts 9:1-19).

We can prayerfully ask, is the service provided empowering the person or enabling them?

This means looking at the effects of the service rendered. Do we see gratitude for the service, any signs of spiritual growth, taking personal responsibility? According to psychcentral.com, “When you empower someone, you’re giving them the tools they need to overcome or move beyond the challenges they face.”

The Apostle Paul gives us a wonderful example of receiving the service and gifts of his fellow Christians as a source of empowerment, using all that was given him for the ministry and the glory of God. Philippians 4:10-11,15-19: “How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Even so, you have done well to share with me in my present difficulty. As you know, you Philippians were the only ones who gave me financial help when I first brought you the Good News and then traveled on from Macedonia. No other church did this. Even when I was in Thessalonica you sent help more than once. I don’t say this because I want a gift from you. Rather, I want you to receive a reward for your kindness.”

Practicing the principles set forth in Scripture can provide some proactive safeguards in our service to the Lord. We suggest several proactive spiritual guidelines and principles regarding our opportunities to serve:

In order to serve the Lord, we need to pray about the opportunities that arise, and what to do about them. We can pray, as Paul did, for continued spiritual growth, including the knowledge of His will. Colossians 1:9–10: “…we have not ceased to pray for you and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding so that you may walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, to please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God…” We can pray for direction to know if our service should be continued, or if we should change our focus. 

We can request prayer for guidance from our fellow Christians.
James 5:16: “Powerful is the heartfelt supplication of a righteous man.”
Ephesians 6:18: “With every prayer and request, pray at all times in the Spirit, and stay alert in this, with all perseverance and intercession for all the saints.”

We must strive to practice wisdom. Matthew 10:16 directs us to “be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.” We are encouraged to be wise – thoughtful, discreet and cautious, yet harmless – innocent – gentle and not provoking or stirring up problems.

Ephesians 5:15-17 instructs us to “walk circumspectly”- accurately, diligently. We need to pray to thoroughly understand situations and needs, how to respond, and the spiritual ramifications and effects of our service. We would not want to continue a service which would be enabling.

Paul shows an important principle of wisdom toward those outside the faith: Colossians 4:5 “Behave wisely toward outsiders, making the best use of your time.”

We are counseled to be loving in times when we are not treated fairly. (The following verses from Luke 6:28-32 are quoted from John Gill’s Exposition of the Bible) “When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer for that person.”

Jesus stresses to be patient and not to exact private revenge. Luke 6:29-30: “If someone slaps you in the face, stand there and take it. If someone grabs your shirt, giftwrap your best coat and make a present of it. If someone takes unfair advantage of you, use the occasion to practice the servant life. No more tit-for-tat stuff. Live generously.”

The lesson of love is restated: Luke 6:31-32: “Here is a simple rule of thumb for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you; then grab the initiative and do it for them! If you only love the lovable, do you expect a pat on the back? Run-of-the-mill sinners do that.”

And even if our service is not appreciated, the Lord appreciates the intention of our hearts. Hebrews 6:10: “For God is not unjust so as to forget your work and the love which you have shown toward His name, in having ministered and in still ministering to the saints.”

Additional Resource:
Christian Questions Podcast 
Episode # 963: “When is Compassion Wrong?”
The value, limits and benefits of properly applied compassion
CQ Rewind Show Notes