Our world rewards self-confidence. The pervasive belief is that we should rely on ourselves at all times—we should be strong, aggressive, go after what we want. Our needs and our wants are our most important consideration. We should be able to handle our lives by ourselves, and if we can’t, we are considered to be weak.

The Bible teaches us the opposite. In the Old Testament, God promised the Israelites that if they obeyed His laws and honored Him, He would reward them with blessings of land, children, successful crops and success in war (Deuteronomy 28:1-14). When they ignored God and tried to live on their terms, they often had real trouble. This promise extended to individuals as well, which we can see If we look at the lives of two of the great patriarchs of the Old Testament.

David was a strong and courageous leader for Israel, but he depended on God to direct him in all aspects of his life. He was confident in battle–but only after he had consulted the Lord to see if he would be successful. The first example we have of David trusting God is in David’s encounter with Goliath, in 1 Samuel 17. In 1 Samuel 17:37 David expresses to Saul complete faith that God will deliver Goliath into his hands, and in verse 45 he tells Goliath the same thing. Of course David went on to prevail over Goliath. Another illustration of David’s reliance on God is in 2 Samuel 5:17-25 when David “inquired of the LORD, saying, Shall I go up against the Philistines? Wilt Thou give them into my hand?” God answers affirmatively and David confidently goes out and defeats the enemy. But David’s life was not without trouble, and he depended on the Lord to help him through the hard times as well. In Psalm 13:1-6, David cries out to God in grief and despair, and yet he never loses his faith that God will answer him in lovingkindness.

Moses, on the other hand, suffered significantly from self-doubt. He doubted his ability to lead Israel out of Egypt and he kept coming up with excuses as to why this plan of God’s would not work. In Exodus 3:11, he asks God “Who am I, that I should go to Pharoah, and that I should bring the sons of Israel out of Egypt?” In Exodus 4:1 he says “What if they (the Egyptians) will not believe me, or listen to what I say?” God patiently answered each of Moses’ objections until finally He became angry at all the prevarication. After Moses tried to use a speech impediment as a final roadblock God appoints Aaron to be his spokesman. But in spite of Moses’ early failure of faith, he does what God has asked; he confronts Pharoah with plague after plague and grows into a man of great faith as he learns to lean on the Lord.

Both of these leaders and many others had one thing in common; their source of strength was God, not self. Their “self”-confidence came through prayer, meditation and faith developed through hard life experiences. While we do not have personal encounters with God like these men had, the Bible says in Romans 15:4: “For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.” In other words, we too can have confidence that through our own lives God will be there to lead and guide and comfort us if we are reaching out to Him and trying to become His followers.

When Jesus came, he changed the nature of God’s relationship to man. Anyone from any nation now had the opportunity to develop a relationship with God, but only through becoming a footstep follower of His son, Jesus Christ. Faith in Jesus—that he is God’s son, the promised Messiah, and that he came to pay the ransom-price for Adam’s sin (1 Corinthians 15:21-22—is not a suggestion for a Christian. It is a requirement (Hebrews 11:6). Development of faith is an ongoing, life-long effort, but the reward is great. To the extent that we achieve faith, we can let go of our worries and truly trust that God has all things in hand—and what better hands could things be in? 

Therefore, true “self”-confidence should not come from self. It should come from our faith, honed throughout our lives by prayer, study and our careful, watchful observations of God’s providences in our experiences. If we have dedicated our lives to following Jesus to the best of our ability, we will be able to see many instances when God led us through thorny issues, as well as seeing His leadings in our joys.

Paul described it best; he had an affliction that he prayed three times to have removed. God answered him, which Paul related in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10: “And He (God) has said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness. Most gladly, therefore, I (Paul) will rather boast about my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses…for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” Paul by himself was unable to rise above his weakness, but by relying on Jesus and God to be strong for him, he glorified them and strengthened himself. 

Trusting God in all aspects of our lives gives us true (self) confidence!  

Additional Resource:
Christian Questions Podcast
Episode #1293: “Am I Playing the Social Status Game?”
Understanding and rooting out the compulsive need for social status and position
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CQ Rewind Show Notes