In Titus 2:5, the Bible teaches that wives should obey their husbands. But how or why should a woman obey when her husband is not acting like a good Christian spouse and father?

1 Peter 3:1-2 (NASB), “In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.” Submissive is Strong’s Greek word #5293 and it means, “to subordinate; reflexively, to obey.”  Does this mean women are to be like children obeying their husbands? No. Consider Ephesians 5:15-21, “See then that you (Christian men and women) walk circumspectly…giving thanks always…submitting to one another in the fear of God.” Paul is telling all believers to be respectful and honor each other. The Greek word for obey in Titus 2:5 is this same word.

We are all to graciously serve each other, both husbands and wives. We copy Jesus’ example in Matthew 20:28 (NASB), “the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve (Greek means to serve like a servant).”  Romans 7:6 (NASB), “we serve (as a servant) in newness of the Spirit…” Jesus served even though others treated Him poorly. We are all to serve even when others do not respond with appropriate behavior.

It’s very tough when a wife doesn’t feel the husband is acting in a godly manner. However, many times when women act consistently respectful of their husbands, husbands start to act wiser and more loving.

Additionally, there are some fine Christian books on marriage. Many offer solid, scriptural advice as to how to build a stronger marriage. If a marriage relationship feels very unhappy and stressful, Christian counseling is a good option.